Rowing Life Lessons: #3 It's Ok If Not Everyone Likes You

I have always worried if people like me. I don't know why, I just do. I'm always nervous that people secretly don't like me. And I feel like in the past I've adapted who I am to make sure I don't ruffle anyone's feathers.

This has been true for me for along time. I recall in middle school once pretending to not like Harry Potter because none of my friends liked Harry Potter. I know, how could I ever pretend to not like Harry Potter? Straight blasphemy.

I digress.

The thing with being around the same people for four years nearly everyday and spending almost every weekend traveling together is you can't really be on everyone's good side all the time. People become less like your friend and more like your brother or sister - and I know I at least fight very openly with my sister. Plus, as a coxswain you're essentially the voice of the boat and at times the team. And not everyone is going to like what you're saying.


It used to bother me when people talked sh!t about me because I felt like I needed everyone on my side. Like I was running a political campaign and needed everyone's votes. Then, around my senior year, it hit me - I didn't give a f@ck what anyone thought. I was there to do my best and to enjoy what I was doing. It was like a weight was lifted off my shoulders. I no longer felt like I needed to please EVERYONE ALL THE TIME. I didn't go looking for fights, but it also didn't bother me as much if someone didn't really like me. I slowly adopted an "I'm here for me" attitude and I think that benefitted me extraordinarily.

Perhaps people will disagree with this post, and that's fine (see what I did there?). But the fact of the matter is, I became comfortable being who I was and stopped being someone for the sake of other people. And in being myself, I found more confidence and a stronger voice. I was able to truly forge friendships with people I cared about, versus trying to be everyone's friend. I was able to focus in on what I was there to do. And quite frankly, I enjoyed it more.

I wish I could go back in time and tell my 11 year old self it's okay to like Harry Potter. What I can do though is make an active effort to make sure that I am being true to myself and my beliefs in everything I do, because, really, who gives a damn what anyone else thinks?*

(*I do care what you think, I'm probably just not gonna agree with it.)